– “Too Many Walls”, Cathy Dennis

Sometimes I wonder why I even bothered to be idealistic. I spent most of my college life marching around Metro Manila whilst shouting for the downfall of the government. I spent the better part of my so-called youth learning about poverty (others’ and my own) and the lack of empathy my fellow students had.

So many hours have been spent fuming at spineless student body presidents, ranting relentlessly and even falling apart from sheer exhaustion. All these have made my college experience in Ateneo two things: academically suicidal and borderline non-existent.

Again I ask myself; “Why did I even bother?”

I’m thinking about these things as I’m sitting here on my cushy chair in an air conditioned office in Ortigas. The irony of ironies never fails to present itself when I report for work each day. Why did I go against the corporate flow all my college life only to sell out and become a corporate whore thereafter?

The answer is frustratingly simple: I did this because I could.

After almost half a decade of being active in cause-oriented groups I have met astounding people who have lived out their life’s calling. These were not twenty somethings assuring you of their lifetime commitment. These were people who were jailed and tortured during Martial law, people who gave the prime of their lives to serving the people. These people, despite all their hardships are the lucky ones. They have purpose, their lives are meaningful.

A good friend once told me: “You’re lucky to have something to die for. The rest of us are just ambling along aimlessly.”

A few years after those fateful words were spoken, I found myself at a job interview. Apparently, I had enough qualifications to become a copywriter for a lingerie retail company. At the time, I was still very much active in the movement and I was a bit hesitant to try anything else. But I was also a firm believer in stretching my wings, trying out things I had never considered before. Needless to say, I accepted the offer.

And here I am now. Staring at underwire bras, soft cup bras, push up bras, Wonderbras, girdles, thongs, boy shorts and whatnot for eight hours a day while trying to amuse myself with more cerebral activities. Though I am far from being a jaded employee, I am still bothered that I am even employed at a corporation; albeit a small one.

After countless recounts of my college activist days, certain thoughts have come into play. I realize that all I needed was a change of scenery to be able to tell myself that I cannot turn my back on activism. I guess you could say that a step back is all you need to realize that you have indeed found your life’s calling. And that your calling doesn’t involve staring at breasts for hours on end.

Every time I am reminded of the sordid situation this country is in, I am appalled by the lack of response from my fellow yuppies. I cannot believe that people can just go about their business and not notice that our country is submerged in a political, moral and economic cesspool. Coming to terms with the growing apathy among young professionals is disheartening.

It is so disturbing to hear those Americanized twangs in Starbucks, talking about their iPods while the rest of our nation is in turmoil. I wish people would learn to be more proactive. Moreover, I wish yuppies would see that no matter how much you make; no matter how accented your speech is and no matter where you go: you will always be Filipino.

We should stop heaping thick unnatural accents on our heritage in an effort to hide it. We should stop playing the apathetic dunces who make money. We should stop because in truth, caring about the society we live in is what sets us apart from the other members of the animal kingdom.

Youth enables one to do so many things. Being young means having enough energy and gall to try and change the status quo. A young professional actually has more reason for rage when taxpayer’s money is pocketed by individuals. You actually pay income tax now. By virtue of shelling out money for the government every month, one should naturally be concerned where it goes.

Which all boils down to my daily question: why did I even bother to become a yuppie if I despise corporations and paying tax so much?

I entered the corporate world because I could. I am employed in an American corporation despite all my political convictions because I can be employed and also, because I am afraid. I am afraid to pass up a chance. I’m afraid that if all I do is march down streets, shout political slogans and discuss ideologies I will never ever learn anything else.

The dissipation of my lifetime learning curve is something that I cannot stomach. But now that I can say: I tried working in a cushy corporate job and it sucks, I can go back to my former life.

Now no one can say I never tried anything else but activism. No one can say that I never experienced a hard day’s labor or that I never paid taxes. I’ve being overworked for a measly pay.

One needs options in order to choose. And now that I’ve tried both corporate whore and militant activist, I can determine where I am called to be.

And you know what?

I’ve decided to turn in my resignation and return to the streets.

Related posts:

1. On Living Alone
2. Not Here
3. Build Movements, Strengthen Solidarity of Young People Against Human Rights Violations

Noong isang araw, naglalakad ako sa kahabaan ng Ortigas. Para sa mga hindi nakaaalam, ang Ortigas ay isa sa mga pangunahing tipunan ng mga bata-batang propesyunal o yuppies. Ngayong bahagi na ako ng mundong yaon, hindi ko maiwasang manibago.

Balik tayo sa kwento.

Habang naglalakad ako, may nakasabay akong isang grupong marahil ay patungo rin sa kanilang tanggapan. Malakas ang pagtatalastasan nila. Hindi ko naman sinasadyang makinig sa usapan nila. Pero talagang may kalakasan kaya nakinig ako. Naghihimutok ang isa dahil luma na ang kanyang cellphone at mahal masyado ang gusto niyang modelo. Natural lang na tumaas ang kilay ko. Sa dami ng suliranin ng lipunan natin, cellphone ang problema ng katabi ko. Hindi man lang siya nanakawan. Luma lang kasi, kaya halos maiyak na siya.

Pero hindi pa diyan nagtatapos at hindi yaon ang dahilan ng init ng ulo ko.

Matapos nilang mapag-usapan ang mga mamahaling cell phone (yung tipong pwede nang bumuhay sa isang maliit na pamilya nang ilang buwan), pinag-usapan nila ang krisis sa bansa natin. Kung gaano sila kasaya at hindi sila kasali dahil may mga magagandang trabaho sila. Pinag-usapan nila kung gaano kasarap mag-ubos ng pera sa Megamall at magpakalasing sa Embassy.

Ayon sa mga kasabay ko, mahirap ang mga mahihirap dahil hindi sila nagsisikap. Kung sana raw nagsisikap lahat ng Pilipino, walang maghihirap.

Sa sistema ng lipunan nating mala-kolonyal at mala-pyudal, walang pag-asang umasenso; kahit maging masipag ka pa. Patuloy tayong inaalipin ng imperyalistang Estados Unidos, patuloy na yinuyurakan ang ating mga karapatan ng isang pasista at diktador na estado. Sa ganitong siste, hindi kasalanan ng mahihirap ang kahirapan nila. Isang kundisyon ang kahirapang inilapat sa milyun-milyon nating mga kababayan.

Sa pagliko ko sa kahabaan ng Emerald, narinig ko silang nag-uusap pa rin. Wala raw silang pakialam sa krisis hangga’t hindi sila apektado.

Ito ang sagot ko sa kanila: ang pagiging walang pakialam — lalo na ang pagyayabang sa pagwawalang bahala sa paghihirap ng kapwa mo Pilipino — nagpapakita lang ng kahinaan ng iyong loob at higit sa lahat, ng kahinaan ng iyong utak. Sa English — sakaling hindi kayanin ng mga utak nila ang Filipino ko: Apathy is tantamount to stupidity.

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Sa mga bansa tulad ng Iraq at Somalia, maaring masawi ang isang mamamahayag dahil sila’y nag-uulat sa gitna ng mga putukan at bombahan. Subalit dito sa Pilipinas, maaring mamatay ang ating mga brodkaster at manunulat dahil lamang nagsiwalat sila ng katotohanan. Mahigit 50 nang alagad ng midya ang namamatay sa ilalim ng rehimen ni Gloria Arroyo. Sa gitna ng matinding krisis sa ekonomiya at pulitika, yaong mga naglalayong baguhin ang lipunan gamit ang pamamahayag ay binubusalan ng rehimen.

Ano nga ba ang itinatago ng rehimeng ito? Ano nga ba ang kinatatakutan nito?

Una, pilit pa ring itinatago ng rehimeng Arroyo ang kanyang umaalingasaw na kabulukan. Patuloy nitong sinusubukang kumbinsihin ang milyong-milyong Pilipinong gutom na: “ramdam nila ang asenso.” Subalit, kung tatanungin mo ang kahit sinong makakasalubong mo sa daan, ito ang kanyang isasagot: “ramdam ko ang panloloko.” Hindi na maikakaila ng rehimeng kung pagbabatayan ang milyun-milyong sikmurang kumakalam sa ating bansa, bulok at walang kwenta ang kanyang mga programang pang-ekonomiya. Dumating na tayo sa panahong hindi na maaaring ipagkaila ang lalong humihirap na buhay sa Pilipinas. Dumating na tayo sa panahong kahit bigas, magsisimula na ng patayan. Gutom na ang ating sambayanan subalit patuloy pa rin ang rehimen sa pagkikibit-balikat, pagsisinungaling at pangungurakot.

Pangalawa, pilit ikinukubli ng rehimeng Arroyo ang sira-sira nitong kredibilidad. Mula pa noon, binabalot na ng kontrobersiya ang rehimen. Napakarami nang mga usapin ng pangungurakot ang naipukol sa rehimen. Mula sa maanomalyang Diosdado Macapagal Boulevard, fertilizer scam hanggang ngayon sa NBN-ZTE scandal; kitang kita ang pagiging tapat ng rehimeng Arroyo. Ang pagiging tapat nito sa interes niya at ng kanyang mga kamag-anak. Ang pagiging tapat nito sa kagustuhang magkamal ng yaman mula sa pinaghihirapang buwis ng mga mamayan.

Pangatlo, lugmok na sa kumunoy ang rehimeng Arroyo at takot itong malaman ito ng mga mamamayan. Nais nitong palabasing patuloy ang kanyang pamamayagpag sa gitna ng maraming indikasyong pagbulusok lamang nito ang nangyayari. Patuloy na sinusubukan ng rehimeng ipakain sa mga mamamayan ang kanyang mga kasinungalingan.

Sa gitna ng lahat ng ito, nanatili ang ating mga makabayang mamamahayag na totoo sa kanilang tungkuling isiwalat ang katotohanan. Kaya naman hindi kataka-takang patuloy rin ang pasistang pambubusabos ng rehimen sa mga nagtatangkang ilabas ang kabulukan nito. Walang habas ang pagpatay at pananakot ng rehimen sa sinumang kritikal o sumasalungat dito. At walang sinasanto ang rehimen. Ultimong mga pahayagang pangmag-aaral sa ating mga kolehiyo’t pamantasan ay hindi nito pinalalampas. Pati ang ang mga estudyanteng krititikal sa rehimen ay pinapaslang, tinatakot at pilit na binubusalan.

Ngayong araw na ito, inaalala ko si Benjaline “Beng” Hernandez ng College Editors Guild of the Philippines na pinaslang noong 2002 sa Cotabato. Ang paghahanap ni Beng ng katotohanan ang dahilan kung bakit siya pinaslang. Siya at ang napakaraming katulad niya ang mga biktima ng isang mapaniil at pasistang rehimen. Subalit dahil rin sa mga tulad niya, patuloy na lumalaban ang mga mamamahayag at ang sambayanan upang matigil na ang walang habas na pagyurak sa ating mga karapatang pantao. Dahil sa patuloy na paghigpit ng pagkakabusal ng rehimen sa kanyang mga mamamayan, tumitindi rin ang pagpupumiglas ng mamamayan.

Naniniwala akong kailanma’y hindi magtatagumpay ang rehimen sa kagustuhan nitong manatili sa kapangyarihan. Naniniwala akong hindi magtatagumpay ang kasamaan laban sa kabutihan. Parating na ang araw mo, Gloria.

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We should condemn the show of force that the Arroyo government did by barging a military tank into the lobby of the hotel. This act was completely uncalled for and unnecessary. We should keep in mind that this administration has no qualms about destroying private property and inconveniencing its tax payers.

Even members of the media were not spared from the fascist measures carried out by the government. It is the media’s job to cover and convey the news as it happens. They are not the enemy. But why is it that even honest people doing their jobs were arrested? We cannot buy the military’s reasons for doing so. In saying that they cannot decipher which were members of the Magdalo groups and which were media personnel, the military is clearly demonstrating its lack of common sense. It should be noted that none of the Magdalo members were posing as journalists. None of them had media identification cards. Clearly, this is another move of the regime to quell press freedom and the public’s right to information. It is unbelievable that even well known media personalities would be mistaken for rebelling soldiers. But it is utterly obvious that the regime took this chance to further its oppressive measures against freedom of speech and the free flow of information.

Many say the imposing of curfew in Metro Manila, Central Luzon and Southern Tagalog is a dry run for martial law. They are wrong. We have long been under an unacknowledged and undeclared martial law. The curfew only shows us that the US-Arroyo regime is hell bent on strengthening its grasp on political power. The curfew is meant to scare the Filipino people into submission. This we must not allow. We must stand firm in our commitment to freedom, peace and democracy. We must not allow a puppet, fascist and oppressive machine to continue its reign. Today, we recognize the symptoms of decay of this fake and corrupt administration. Today, we move to oust this woman who has long been masquerading as our president.

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1. Arroyo Resurrects Marcos, Betrays Spirit of EDSA
2. The State of National Emergency: A Setback in Democracy
3. Perspective

We are a fickle-minded people. By the time I got to high school, people on the street were screaming for Estrada’s blood. I thought it only logical. He seemed like a bumbling idiot, a womanizing corrupt idiot at that. I felt it was high time he resigned. With people shouting bloody murder in the streets, Estrada stepped down. In hind sight, I think he didn’t have the balls to stay in power. He couldn’t bear being unpopular.

When Estrada stepped down, my bourgeoisie self was appeased. Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo seemed a far better person. At least she went to college. When she came to power, we were all in high spirits. Finally, something would be done right in this forlorn country. At last, here was someone who was qualified to run our country. She promised us better governance, healthier industries and better social services. Moreover, she promised to be the transition into something better. And we, suckers that we were; believed her.

Now here we are, six years down the road. Our lives have not improved, our foreign debt has ballooned, and millions of our country men are starving to death. And let’s not get started on corruption in the government. What then do we think of the promises of EDSA 2? Slowly and painfully, the middle class and civil society must admit this very obvious fact: we were duped and we are paying for it. Our president has betrayed the very principles that put her to power. In fact, we have been short changed twice over. First when we believed in the fairy tale called the “transition president”. Next, when we accepted her legitimacy despite all the noise that the “Hello Garci” scandal created. We seem to forget all too easily how this regime has made our lives more miserable.

We need not look at the business pages to see how low our country has sunk. The peso-dollar rate only reflects how many have been forced to work abroad. It is no wonder that the peso is growing stronger, the scarcity of jobs in this country has forced the most talented and better educated of us to work abroad. No, the exchange rate is not proof of a growing economy. It is only proof of the dwindling opportunities in this country.

During Estrada’s term, almost two hundred political activists and critics of his government were murdered. Under Arroyo, almost a thousand political activists, media practitioners and student leaders have died. Almost 200 have gone missing. So many have clamored for justice yet their voices have reached deaf ears. And if these weren’t enough, we now have the Human Security Act which can brand anyone who speaks out a terrorist. It is a law that legalizes warrantless arrest, detention of up to 72 hours, surveillance and wire tapping. I feel like I’m living in the martial law years. Indeed, if we look closely; the Human Security Act is martial law relabeled. And it does not help that Arroyo has once again proclaimed innocent convicted criminals. With the pardoning of Joseph Estrada, one can only wonder: at what cost? Surely, a deal was made somewhere. This washing of hands can only be seen as a desperate attempt of the administration to silence the opposition.

Tell me, after two EDSAs; did we get what we bargained for? Do we deserve another fascist regime? I may never have liked Estrada but I don’t like Arroyo better. For in all respects, she is worse; much worse than Estrada.

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1. Agitation
2. Erap Pardon Will Not Save Arroyo
3. A Liar Has No Right to the Presidency

Long before Mrs. Arroyo became president by default, Philippine society at large has been constantly hampered by its lack of political will. It is a dreadful thing, that our politicians today more that ever takes this tradition to heart. Even in the ranks of the local government units, lack of political will seems to be order of the day. I am not one to speak about the history of our political life; I’m only twenty. When I was born, Cory Aquino was already the president, and the airwaves were full of positive news about the political climate. This makes anyone my age agonize at the seemingly slow pace any movement in our society has been taking. It is good though, that unlike in the 70s and 80s, the sides are clearly drawn.

What we perceive as red is red. When we raise our eyebrows at yellow, we are sure that we are raising our eyebrow at the true perpetrators of yellow. And of course, left is left and right, well by golly, will never be left! People my age seem to forget the simple lessons we learn in college about the political spectrum. Twenty somethings usually look like they are going through “quarter life crisis”. More often than not, the bourgeoise of my generation refuse to take part in most political exercises. I know people older than I am who haven’t even tried to vote, much less register for the elections. Their reason: plain and simple pareparehas lang yan or wala na tayo magagawa. Or worse, “we are professionals making money and have no time to take part in dumb politics.”

I raise my eyebrows when I hear those reasons from my peers. What of all the education we get from our books and classrooms? What better way to find out the truth than to dive into the issues head on? What better time to take sides than when you are single, out of college and young enough to run a kilometer or so?

It’s funny. Sometimes I feel like Jose Rizal overestimated the youth. When he said that we were the hope of the nation, he never dreamed that we would become this apathetic to our fellow Filipinos. Everyday, Filipinos are dying because of lack of proper water irrigations, high prices of basic commodities, “friendly fires” in war torn Mindanao and even overseas where they constantly face abusive employers and yes, US aggression.

Now more than ever is the time to go to the streets. Now is the time to see the political climate as it really is: going from bad to worst.

Nothing can be more important than finding out for yourself, finding your own political niche. Go with those who, despite rheumatism and weak joints still go rallying and taking part in other political exercises. As on of my teachers in Ateneo said: “the mere act of getting out of bed in the morning is political.”

Why?

It’s because true political life requires decisiveness.

Naniniwala si Tish Martinez na hindi kailanman nasasayang ang panahong inilaan sa pagsisilbi sa bayan.

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Ang kaso, hindi lang ang mga ito ang mga halimbawa.

Kamakailan lamang, inabswelto ng Ombudsman ang mga opisyal ng Commission on Elections (Comelec) at iba pang pribadong indibidwal sa kanilang maanumalyang Mega Pacific automation contract. Animo’y bumaliktad ang langit at lupa nang maabsuwelto sila. Sa gitna ng napakaraming ebidensyang nagsasasabing sila’y nagkasala, nakalusot pa rin sila. Tila nagpapasalamat ang administrasyon sa Comelec sa kanyang mga ginawang “magaganda” para rito. Kahit sino pa ang iyong tanungin, tila may kakaiba na namang nangyayari sa ating gubyerno. Samantalang dali-daling isinuspinde ang ibang opisyal na hindi pa napapatunayang may ginawa talagang kabalastugan. Something is highly irregular, ika nga.

Itinatag ang Ombudsman para imbestigahan nang matino ang lahat ng maanumalyang mga transaksyon sa larangan ng serbisyong pampubliko. Nagkaroon ng Ombudsman para masigurong walang nasasayang sa kaban ng bayan. May Ombudsman para panatilihin ang katapatan ng estado sa mamamayan. Pero sa ginagawa nito ngayon, ipinapakita lamang niya kung nakanino talaga ang kanyang katapatan. At magaling itong opisinang ito ngayon. Marunong na itong mamili ng kanyang mga kakalabanin. Ang nakalulungkot, nalilimutan na ng Ombudsman na hindi dapat ang administrasyon kundi ang mga mamamayan ng bansang ito.

Nakapanlulumong isipin na ang ika-27 seksyon ng konstitusyon ay patuloy na ipinagsasawalang-bahala ng mga nakaupo sa puwesto. Ang pananatili sa pwesto ang animo’y pinakamahalagang bahagi ng pagiging “public servant”. Tila isang nakalimutang larangan na ang tunay na paglilingkod sa bayan. Karamihan sa mga nakaupo sa puwesto, sariling interes lamang ang pinagkakaabalahan. At para sa mga tulad kong simpleng nagmamasid sa mga ibinabalita ng diyaryo at telebisyon, isang malaking panlilinlang sa bayan ang patuloy na ginagawa ng administrasyon. Walang ipinagkaiba ang mga ginagawa nila sa isang dula o sine, kunwa-kunwarian lamang lahat. Ang masakit, kapag natapos ang palabas; balik ang manonood sa tunay na buhay. Pagkatapos ng pagpapakitang-gilas ng administrasyon sa harap ng mga kamera ng media, balik sa hirap ang mamamayan. Para kanino nga ba talaga ang lahat ng ito?

Si Tish,20, ay nag-aaral sa Ateneo de Manila University. Kasapi rin siya ng Migrante Youth Philippines.

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Habang pinagmamasdan ko ang mga litrato, nanlulumo ako sa galit. Ika nga “war is young men dying for old men’s greed.” Yun nga lang, karamihan sa kanila ay babae. Mga 13 hanggang 19 ang mga edad nila. Hindi ka ba maa-asar man lamang pag nalaman mong walang-awa silang ipinadala sa giyera ng imperyalistang Hapon? Kaya mo bang magkibit-balikat?

Ako, hindi.

Kaya ako nagsusulat ngayon. Hindi lang dahil gusto kong ilabas ang poot ko. Dahil na rin hindi ako kailanman titigil sa pagsusulat hangga’t may mga mapaniil na lumalapastangan sa karapatan ng mga kabataan.

Sabi nila, those who win the war write history. Kung ganoon, gusto ko manalo ang mga lumalaban para sa karapatang pantao.

Produkto ako ng mga pagkamatay sa Okinawa. Kasama sa mga mukhang nakita ko ang mukha ng aking mga ninuno. Nalungkot ako at nag-isip.

Ano pa ba magagawa ko?

Tila binulungan ako ng aking obasan (lola): kapitan mo at ituloy ang paniniwalang hindi na dapat maulit pa ang digmang agresyon ng mga imperalista.

Hindi ito ang panahon upang manghina. Walang panahon upang manghina.

Si Tish, 20, ay matinding tagahanga ng mga palikurang gumagana. Siya ay Chinoy na Espanyol na, Okinawan pa. Sa kasalukuyan, nasa Migrante Youth siya at doo’y nagpapakadalubhasa sa pakikipagkapwa-tao.

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